Corrupt-A-Wish

  • Thread starter Thread starter L. Spiro
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I'm guessing you fell down the other day?

Granted, but you no longer get any snow.  It's either acid rain or hail.

I wish it would snow here (After moving to a tropical country, I really miss the snow...)
 
Granted, but your roof caves in and crushes you.

I wish that my boring weekend is over so I can talk to my friends in person.
 
Granted, but then your friends become boring, so it hardly makes a difference.

I wish that my weekends actually felt like real weekends (i.e. not having anything to do during them).
 
I haven't fallen yet, but I've had to walk quite awkwardly to avoid it.

Now you don't have to do anything at weekends. Or weekdays, because you've just been fired/kicked out of school or university.

I wish I had an en-suite bathroom.
 
It looks like no one wants to corrupt your wish.  I guess I'll do it, then.

Granted, but there won't be any water supplied to it.  The sink doesn't work, the shower doesn't work, and the toilet doesn't work.

I wish that tornados wouldn't cause any damage.  They can still move things, but the damage would be zero.  Imagine waking up in the morning to find that your house has migrated a couple hundred miles.
 
Granted, but everything the tornado hits is thrown to the bottom of the ocean, so all the people die anyway ^_^

I wish I had a billion pounds (sterling)
 
Granted, but tomorrow the UK becomes a communist state.

I wish that every mod I tried to make would work first time.
 
Granted, but after your first time of trying them out, they mysteriously stop working.

I wish to be two meters tall.
 
Fine, but you weigh 60kg and look really weird.

I wish that Sartre made sense.
 
Granted, but because he starts to make more sense, he also begins to sound less sophisticated, and is no longer taken so seriously.

I wish for unsurpassed wisdom.
 
Granted, your wisdom becomes unsurpassed because everyone else becomes stupid.

I wish I could divide by zero.
 
Granted, but you cannot divide by any other number.

I wish it were possible to fight Sapphire Weapon in FF7 before it was shot down by the Mako cannon at Junon.
 
Fine, but it has 10,000 HP and its biggest attacks do about 300 damage; it's a big disappointment.

I wish that what has been seen *could* be unseen.
 
Granted. But you're a faggot and your breasts are on fire, also you lost the game.

I wish that my friend wasn't sleeping on me right now, regardless of how innocent he may look xD
 
Granted. He's sleeping with you right now  :wink:


I wish that this would happen in the UK.
 
Granted. He's sleeping with you right now  :wink:


I wish that this would happen in the UK.
Click to expand...
Granted. A day before this comes into power your computers grow a mind of their own and look up to Woolworths, they shut down forever. Someone buys the name and opens an internet shopping service. Your 'funny pictures' money is now only spendable on websites such as ebay.de and a french version of somerfield.com

I wish, I wish, I was a fish. On fire.
 
Uh... sure, granted.  If you wanna die by being transformed into a burning fish, then I guess that's all okay...

I wish that Earth would triple in size, solving the current overpopulation problem.
 
OK, but since Earth is bigger, its gravity is much stronger too and just standing up is a struggle.

i wish that I were drunk now.
 
Granted.  As of "Yesterday at 18:24:14", you were drunk.  But now it's over.

I wish I could view any moment in the past on my computer screen.
 
Fine, but you get a feeling of utter helplessness watching Hitler being elected and not being able to do anything about it.

I wish that Sony memory sticks had a cost per gigabyte of storage nearer to that of HDDs.
 
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